The Book of the Future

Through our benevolent power, We intend to create a better world. By pledging your allegiance to Vanderstank and our wonderful line of products, you are directly helping to shape a more perfect future. A future We control to our every whim and whimsy. Why? Because We understand the future. We know the future. We are the future.

We are the only ones that can be trusted in this world. Society can either follow the path that We and our Friends are carving through the universe, or society can go its own way and be left behind in the dust of the world. You must understand that Vanderstank is the Only Way Forward.

If you do not with to fall in line with Our vision for the future, you risk not only embarrassing yourself when the rest of the world gathers in Our Presence to join in the New Society, but you also risk the death and destruction of everything you hold dear in this world. We are Many. We are Legion. We are all around you when you're not looking. We are the ones who pull the strings when you think you are in control. And we will make terrible things happen to those who do not join us when the time comes.

We will not hesitate to act if you choose to disagree.

We will not flinch as we crush your life.

You do not understand how the world truly works.

LET US UNDERSTAND IT FOR YOU.

V + A + N + D + E + R + S + T + A + N + K

22 + 1 + 14 + 4 + 4 + 18 + 19 + 20 + 1 + 14 + 11 = 129

"All this the world well knows; yet none knows well
To shun the heaven that leads men to this hell."

—William Shakespare, sonnet 129

129 is the sum of the first 10 prime numbers

PRIME = 1

10 - 1 = 9

Vanderstank has 9 letters

9 = 1

VANDERSTANK IS PRIME

THE TIME HAS COME

JOIN US OR BE LEFT BEHIND

We are the only ones still in control

We see a future you cannot see without our help

WE ARE YOUR SALVATION

WE ARE THE ONLY WAY FORWARD

ALL GLORY TO VANDERSTANK

ALL GLORY TO OUR LORD CAROLINE