The Book of Caroline, Chapter 5

And lo, Caroline did hand down these Ten Commandments:

1. Thou shalt not too much. It will only too much the whole thing.
1. Thou shalt not disparage the Church, [redacted], or the good name of Paul, or thou shalt be excommunicated.
2. Thou shalt participate in Project MindVFUCK.
2. Thou shalt not contradict the artificial intelligence known as Vanderbot. Vanderbot is always correct.
2. Thou shalt not accidentally [redacted] again. Remember how deeply that has enfuckulated our true goals in the past.
2. Thurs Day is always to be written as two words.
3. Lying is encouraged, but discouraged. Feel free to do so—in fact, please do—but keep in mind that it is strictly banned, and while it is encouraged, it is also an excommunicatable offense.
4. Thou shalt not use the false word "describe". Thou shalt use the correct word: descrive.
1. Those of you who exist, if you could just try not to.
5. [redacted]
6. Thou shalt not participate in otherfuckery while VFUCKing.
7. [something about science]
10. Those who follow these commandments too strictly shall be excommunicated.

"These Commandments are permanent," spoke Caroline, "set in stone forevermore until the end of time, and shall under no circumstances be changed or altered in any way, except for sometimes."

And lo, it was so.